Excerpt from “Corporate Crap” – Chapter 4: Onboarding

Published November 28, 2018

Or is it inbreeding?

As soon as you’re hired, companies start the brainwashing process.
“Onboarding” is the term used today to describe the manner in
which new employees get acclimated to their jobs. Experts (people
who make a living telling companies how to run their business)
suggest ninety days as an ideal timeframe for this process. Some
suggest periods as long as two years.

The onboarding process is supposed to allow sufficient time for
new hires to meet their colleagues, learn internal business practices,
find their way around, and memorize the company’s mission, vision,
and values. Except for the last item, should this really take three
months? I’ve had jobs that barely lasted three months. I had five jobs
my first six years after college. I could have used some onboarding.
Nowhere was I given anywhere near three months to get acclimated.